Are your relationships helping or hindering you?

Your Weekly Motivation with Deborah Pratt

“A SHIP is supposed to carry you somewhere. If the fellowSHIP, friendSHIP or relationSHIP is not taking you to HIGHER LEVELS, then abandon that SHIP!!!”

I read the above on a Facebook post some time ago and found it quite profound.

We are all familiar with sayings such as “Birds of a feather, flock together” or “One bad apple spoils the whole bunch”; both of which imply that people are judged by the company they keep or that people are more likely to be influenced by those they associate with.

An unknown author once wrote the following:


If there are people in your life that continually disappoint you, break promises, stomp on your dreams, are too judgmental, have different values, and don’t have a shoulder to cry on during difficult times...that is not a friend.

To have a friend, be a friend. Sometimes in life as you grow, your friends will either grow or go.

Surround yourself with people who reflect your values, goals, interests and lifestyle.

When I think of any of my successes, I am thankful to God from whom all blessings flow, and to my family and friends that enrich my life.

Over the years my address book has changed because I changed for the better.

 At first you think that you are going to be alone, but after a while new people show up in your life that make your life so much sweeter and easier to endure.

Remember the expression, “Birds of a feather flock together.”

If you’re an eagle, don’t hang around chickens:

Chickens Can’t Fly!

So often people with big dreams and aspirations allow their dreams to die because of others; people who may not believe in them or support their dreams. Your success in life depends a lot on your relationships; those persons that you spend a lot of time with be it your fellowship (people that you worship with), your friendships (buddies or best friends) or relationships such as a boyfriend or girlfriend. These persons have the power to help make or break you; to bring you up or take you down. Are you in healthy relationships?

Do you fellowship with others in a church setting? If so, is it just a routine or do you feel that you are growing in Christ? Are you being empowered? Are you reminded that you can do all things through Christ? Are there persons in your fellowship that you can look to for guidance; that can mentor you?

Your fellowship may also be with groups such as civic organizations. If you are looking to better your life, to develop yourself and be of service to your community, you may also align yourself with a group or organization that would help you in this area. Surround yourself with people of similar positive interests; people that can mentor and help you along the way.

What about your friendships? Do your friends share the same interests, values and goals as you do? Not necessarily the same interests or goals as in having similar dreams or wanting to accomplish the same thing but are they as ambitious as you are? Do they aspire to make better lives for themselves? Do your friends encourage you to pursue your dreams or are they judgmental; scoffing and laughing at you? Are they happy when you succeed or do they become jealous or envious?

Are you involved in a relationship, not those of you who are already married but those who may be seriously dating? Does your significant other have similar interests, values and goals? Are you really compatible with each other? Does he or she support you in your quest for self development? In a relationship it is very important that you are “equally yoked”; having similar beliefs and interests, being there supporting and encouraging each other.

If you are an ambitious person striving for success, I admonish you today to ponder on these questions, examine all of your relationships and determine for yourself if they are helping you on your road to success or if they are hindering you; preventing you from succeeding. After doing so, make a conscious decision to do what you have to; hold on to those relationships that you see as helping you and let go of those that may be hindering you. It may be difficult at first but worth it in the end. Remember, “A SHIP is supposed to carry you somewhere. If the fellowSHIP, friendSHIP or relationSHIP is not taking you to HIGHER LEVELS, then abandon that SHIP!!!” If you don’t abandon that ship, you may very well sink with it!

• Questions or comments on this column may be sent to

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